Tepid

How do I combat the blues?  I’m on Prozac.  This wonder drug makes my mind slow down; otherwise it would race like a gerbil on a wheel.  It also fights off negative thoughts by not allowing them to enter my head; also changing a lifetime of habits helps.  The second one isn’t as easy as popping a pill.  The last couple of days fear and worry have seeped into my head.  I have to tell myself that most of the things I worry about will never come true.  

I’ve been taking Prozac a year now;  I’ve noticed that my mind is quieter.  I don’t invent things to worry about.  I’m emotionally tepid; neither hot nor cold.  After a lifetime of feeling everything from red-hot, boiling rage to “I don’t want to leave the bed” depression, a state of rest is unsettling.  The remedy for that is simple:  watch or read something that will disturb me.  The news.  The Walking Dead.   An animal rescue blog.  It’s like poking myself with a pin to see if the nerves still work.

I didn’t say I made sense.

 

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